As girls, most of us learn that a large part of our role is to take care of others. These skills seem to come easy and we feel good doing it. As an adult, much of our personal story and self-worth is built around caring for our children and life partners. There’s a satisfaction when we know our loved ones are ecstatically eating their favorite food, contently hanging out in the room that’s decorated just the way they like, or excitedly open that gift they didn’t ask for, but as a mom you had the insight to know it was perfect. There is not much that compares to the heart opening we feel when see our loved one is filled with joy.
Until it stops feeling good, and we feel drained, — and lost. We are taking care of most responsibilities, but feel angry or resentful for having to do so. Our life looks great on the outside, but on the inside it feels like a mess. This is because we have forgotten how to take care of one thing, ourselves.
After years tending to others, its difficult identifying what we desire or think is fun. Taking care of ourselves first is what’s needed to have the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual resources to give to the ones we love. Then, those around us get permission to take care of themselves too, — especially our daughters. So for today, think of one thing that you can do . . . just for you.
Guest Bloggist, Gigi Colombini, is a supporter of “A Beautiful Me®” and provides outpatient psychotherapy for individuals, couples and families, her specialties are working with youth and their families. www.GColombiniCounseling.com. Visit www.mcspc.org for valuable information, specifically the “Holding On To Life” toolkit that was designed to help those concerned for a loved one who may be in crisis or at risk for suicide.